March please be kind to me...

I can't believe it's already 5 days into March. I'm so glad that February is over. These last four weeks have not been kind. They have by far been some of the toughest weeks I've ever had. I've had so much going on between Nanny being sick, me being sick, Baby Z going through separation anxiety, homeschooling(which I'm so behind in), housework that I don't think I'll ever get caught up with, meetings and plans that had to be re-arraigned and re-scheduled, going on days without sleep, Hubby working over time to make up for me not working at all, Anna's work schedule changing, Corey starting school, Katie having flu, Bailey having (minor)surgery, then nanny's passing, trying to plan a funeral ,plus more...it's been a tough few weeks....really tough for us.

I don't know if I could have handled it, if I had not had people praying for me. I'm feeling better and life is starting to calm down around here. I had lunch with Samantha & Ashley today and then I came home and went to bed and I've slept pretty much all day. I was just exhausted...we are all so exhausted.

Despite all that has happened, we have also been blessed. Blessed with lots of time with our extended family and with friends over these last few days. My children got to meet all of my mom's side of the family (most for the very first time) and what a joy it was to see my relatives loving on my children and them talking & laughing together...it blessed my heart. My nanny would be so proud if she could have seen us all together these last few days. We've been showered with so much kindness & love from everyone and my heart is just overflowing.

It's going to take time to get back to normal. Our lives won't be the same without Nanny here, but we know that she is so much better off now. I wouldn't trade the time I've had with her these last few weeks for nothing. I had the sweetest times & talks with her and I was there when God called her home. It was hard watching her take that last breath knowing that she had to go. She was my last grandparent living. She was 76 years old. I would have loved having another 10 or 20 years with her, but it was her time and she was tired. I was blessed to have her as long as I did,because she's been sick for so long.

 One time my pastor JT told me something that has stuck with me all these years. He said, "Do you know where your love one is? Then you haven't lost them. When you loose something you don't know where it is. You are only separated for a little while." He is right. I know where my Nanny is ,without a doubt ,and I know where I'm going.

February wasn't very kind at all, but maybe March will bring us better days. Please continue to remember us.

Trust in the LORD with all thine heart;and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him,and he will direct thy paths. ~Proverbs 3:5-6