You must be homeschooled if...

You Must Be Homeschooled If...
Someone asks what grade you're in and you're not sure.
You sometimes go to school in your pajamas.
You sleep till 9:00 am on school days, but get up early on Sundays.
Your favorite author is Jane Austen (girls) or Robert Louis Stevenson (boys).
You own the entire series of Saxon Math books.
Your birthday is an official school holiday.
You don't get to stay home from school when you're sick.
You are unaware of the current fads, fashions, and slang terms.
Your favorite activity is reading.
You know what a unit study is.
Watching a movie means you'll have to write a report comparing the film to the book.
You dress up as historical or literary characters for Halloween.
You exchange e-mail Valentines with your homeschool pen pals.
Your room looks like a science lab.
You can get science credit for going to the dentist.
You go to the park for P.E.
You check out at least ten books every time you visit the library.
You have ever attempted to teach yourself physics.
You have no idea what rock bands are currently popular.
You get books and science kits for your birthday.
You know what Latin roots are.
Your board games all have names like "Bookworm", "Scrabble", "S'math", "Game of Knowledge", and "Name The State".
Your home library is arranged in Dewey Decimal order.
Your favorite place to study is outside, under a tree.
You can quote lines from Shakespeare, but not from South Park.
You memorize math formulas for fun.
You never get nervous on the first day of school.
The only bully you ever run into is your big brother.
You don't have to remember a locker combination, just your computer password.
It takes you less than a minute to walk to school.
You don't have to worry about forgetting anything - you can just run back to your room and get it.
Your school bus is a van.
There are only six students in your class - but all of them are your brothers and sisters.
You have a 12-year-old, a 6-year-old, and a 2-year old in the same class.
You can get extra credit for cleaning your room.

The Top 20 Reasons to Homeschool

20. Your kids never tell you that you're a lot dumber than their teacher.
19. If you can't find matching socks for your child first thing in the morning, who cares?
18. Cleaning out the refrigerator can double as chemistry lab.
17. Your kids never have a reason to think they'll get beat up by a gang at school.
16. If the principal gives the teacher a bad evaluation, she can stick her icy feet against his legs at night.
15. You can post the Ten Commandments on your school room wall, and you won't get sued.
14. You never have to drive your child's forgotten lunch to school.
13. Your child will never go to their 20th high school reunion, meet an old flame, and recklessly abandon their marriage.
12. You get to change more than diapers, you get to change their minds.
11. If you get caught talking to yourself, you can claim you're having a PTA meeting.
10. It's better to be slightly concerned about socialisation than very concerned about socialism.
9. Your child will never suffer the embarrassment of group showers after PE.
8. The only debate about the school lunch program is whose turn it is to cook.
7. You never have to face the dilemma of whether to take your child's side or the teacher's side in a dispute at school.
6. If your child gets drugs at school it's probably Tylenol.
5. The teacher gets to kiss the principal in the faculty lounge and no one gossips.
4. Your kids recognize that this list is numerically in reverse order.
3. Your honour student can actually read the bumper sticker that you have put on your car.
2. If your child claims that the dog ate his homework you can ask the dog.
1. Some day your children will consider you to be a miracle working expert and will turn to you for advice.

In Our School

In our school there will be
no boring lectures, no politically-correct textbooks, no required courses, no graffiti-covered walls, no overcrowded classrooms, no high-stakes testing, no strict schedules, and no dress codes…
But the whole world will be an open book as we run free to windsung poems,and we will rejoice as we explore the wonders of God's creation.
By Teri Ann Berg Olsen

The Homeschool kids who can't do anything By Zak Gahagan

We are the homeschool kids who can’t do anything
We just stay at home and do our work
And if you ask us to do anything
We’ll just tell you
We can’t do anything.
Well, I can’t pass notes in math class
and I’ve never bought my school lunch
and I’ve never had my homework eaten by the family dog
and I’ve never had a hall pass
and I’ve never owned a locker
and I’ve never had detention after school.
We are the homeschool kids who can’t do anything
We just stay at home and do our work
And if you ask us to do anything
We’ll just tell you
We can’t do anything.
Well, I’ve never been suspended
and I’ve never missed the school bus
and I’ve never got a fat lip from the bully in the hall
and I’ve never seen the school nurse
and I’ve never slapped erasers
and I’ve never had detention after school.
We are the homeschool kids who can’t do anything
We just stay at home and do our work
And if you ask us to do anything
We’ll just tell you
We can’t do anything.
Well, I’ve never changed for P.E.
and I’ve never had a swirlie
and I’ve never had a teacher that I didn’t like at all
and I’ve never had supply lists
and I’ve never answered roll call
and I’ve never had detention after school.
We are the homeschool kids who can’t do anything
We just stay at home and do our work
And if you ask us to do anything
We’ll just tell you
We can’t do anything.
But we’ve often taken field trips
and we go to school in pjs
and we often do our work while sitting on our favorite couch
and we finish school by lunchtime
and we find our books on ebay
and we don’t have any homework after school!

Why you should Homeschool

1. You want more time with your kids
2. You enjoy a flexible schedule
3. Your kids are asking you to homeschool them
4. Your kids are bored in school
5. You want to impart your family's values to your kids
6. You are a rebel and you want to irritate your in-laws (just kidding)
7. Your child's safety at school is a concern
8.You want your kids to have a more balanced life
9. You want more time for extracurricular activities
10. Your family travels frequently