Why I Do What I Do...

Over and over I've been asked "Why I chose to foster special needs kids?". Why would I want to take on all of this extra work, doctor appointments, therapies, court dates, meetings, and so on? I've heard it over and over, "I just couldn't do what you do". So I thought about it for a while. Now, I'd like to take a few minutes and answer that question. I'm just going to throw it out there the best that I can. I'm not a good writer, but I'll try to share what's on my heart.
I didn't sign up for "special needs kids". I let the case manager know right up front that I was not interested in special needs kids, but very quickly I realized something, all foster children have special needs. It may be something as simple as the need for a safe place to sleep for the night or it could be a child who has been through things that most of you can't even begin to imagine.
God put a calling on my life several years ago. Although, I believe it was even before I was born. I knew it long before I signed up for fostering (that's another post for another day). I didn't understand it. My husband for sure didn't understand it. My own children, they accepted it. God bless their sweet hearts for the sacrifices they have made. Family and friends just thought we were nuts. I started praying about it, for a year to be exact, I prayed. I prayed, "God if this is your will and not just my imagination then reveal it to my husband"...who had NO desire to take in other people's kids.
God done exactly as I asked and that's where our journey began. Once I gave in to my calling, I have been blessed to witness miracles over and over in the lives of my kids. It has humbled me as well a brought me more joy than I ever imagined possible. These kids needed God and they needed me and I'm just thankful that God let me be on HIS team.
If I had not gave in, I wouldn't have seen my sweet little Bean eat for the first time without a tube down her nose. After being kicked out of 3 foster homes, I got the call for a boy we nicknamed JJ. I questioned God if he was still for sure that I was the right person for the job when I met that boy. I had met my match, but I didn't give up and I didn't give in. I looked far and wide to get the help he needed and with help he turned his life around and was a dream come true to his adopted family. He also learned to use the potty so that he could go to school. I got a call for a baby girl who had been burned and had several broken bones. She came to me with hot pink casts from the waist down. I was there to witness it when she regained the use of her legs. I was there to help little Z pick up his broken pieces, so that his little broken heart could heal. Everything he ever owned fit right in the bottom of a pillowcase that he drug behind him. I've rocked babies for hours as they went through withdrawals. Little Jay (not his real name), learned that bath tubs aren't horrible places. After several weeks, he realized that he could trust that I wouldn't hurt him. I spent almost 2 years running up and down the stairs all during the night as ventilator alarms went off on Miss B. She was feisty and she was strong. She was one of my favorites. I was there as she slowly started to regain the use of her paralyzed body. Boy do I miss that little girl. I've put in trachs, replaced feeding tubes, and even stood by as my husband revived one of our babies who stopped breathing in the night. I spent weeks in the hospital with a child that screamed night and day. She had an awful thing called RAD. That child went from hating everybody and everything to loving me more than probably any of my other foster kids ever did. Mr T, now that boy spent his days trying to destroy my property. He did a good job too. He may grow up to be a demolitionist one day. It was a good day for me, when I finally got him on the bus with all of his clothes on. I can't help but smile about it now. Yesterday, I held the hand of a little girl as she had scans done at Children's. They needed to see if her head injuries and nine broken bones have healed. May I add, despite the rain and the long drive to Atlanta, it was a good day, because she is doing so much better! That little boy pictured above, now that's my little boy. He's my pride and joy. He was very sick. My sickest kid. The one they thought wouldn't make it. I've taken him all over the state of Ga to get the help he needs. I've drug him for 3 years to therapy three days a week, sometimes more. I've listened to all of his doctors and therapists and followed every recommendation under the sun. BUT, I entrusted him to the Great Physician. I was there when he finally walked for the first time without a walker. What an amazing day for my amazing Blaze. He is doing so good now! My God has for sure done wonders.
If I had never gave in to my calling, look what I would have missed. We all have a calling and I don't think it is to just exist for ourselves, our own family, or earthly pleasures. No, I think this thing called life is given to us for so much more than that. I believe we are all here to be the hands and feet of God. He gave us all a gift to use for His glory. If he can use a regular old ordinary plain Jane girl like me, He can use anybody. He can use you too. I hope I've answered the question. You may not understand it and that's ok because you don't have to. It's not your journey. Please don't praise me and for sure don't pity me. It's all God and He has done some amazing things with my life. Let's give ALL the praise and glory to HIM. Now you know why I do what I do.

 Trust in the LORD with all thine heart;and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him,and he will direct thy paths. ~Proverbs 3:5-6