Who I Am...

Who I Am...

Who I was, is not who I am ,
and who I am, is not who I hope to be.

~~~~~~

I spent my whole childhood dreaming of where I'd be and who I'd be someday.

Then life happened. It wasn't the picture perfect Fairy Tale life that I had imagined in my childish dreams.
However,it was my life and I was the only one who could live it. 
For a while, I was in control(I thought). I was in the drivers seat and doing things my way. I was headed down the road of life, wide open, at full speed. But, I wasn't doing so well. The roads I kept taking were turning me in circles and taking me down dead end streets. 
After a while, I got tired and weak from driving alone ,so I moved to the passenger seat and I let  
God have the wheel and that's when my life changed.

 I've been blessed, stressed, happy, sad, secure, insecure, stable, unstable, carefree, worried, comfortable, uncomfortable, on my feet, on my knees, and everything in between.

I've experienced times of complete joy and times of extreme sadness.
 I've been on the mountain top and I've been in the valley.
All of these have made me who I am.
So before you judge me let me tell you who I am.

Who Am I?

I am a human and I mess up daily hourly...but I don't mean to. 

I make promises that I sometimes can't keep, but I try to.

I am not always as kind as I could be, but I want to be.

I am sometimes not happy or pleasant to be around, but I try to be.

I get angry and frustrated at times, but I don't like to be.

I sometimes forget things that I should remember, but I don't mean to.

I read my Bible ,but not everyday, but I try to.

I don't go to church every time the door opens, but I work hard to.

I don't always see eye to eye with the ones around me,but I want to.
I complain from time to time, but I try not to.

I don't always live as God wants me to, but I try to.

I'm not the best wife in the world, but I want to be.

I don't give my offering every week, but I try to.

I am not a perfect mother to my children, but I want to be.

I am not always the best friend to my friends, but I mean to be.

I am not the perfect daughter,but I try to be.

I don't always except my faults as my own, but I try to.

I am not a great homemaker, but I want to be.

I am not always on time,but I try to be.

I am not always the first to volunteer,but I try to.

I don't pray as often as I should, but I want to.

I don't always remember to pray for others when they ask, but I try to.

I don't always put God first, but I desire to.

I don't always show my true feelings, but I want to.

I don't always make the best of what I have, but I try to.

I don't always show compassion, but I try to.

I sometimes struggle to forgive others, but I'm trying to.

I don't always do my best, but I strive to.

I don't always do things God's way, but I desire to.

I don't always take the right path,but I want to.
I don't take the best care of my body, but I'm trying to.

As you can tell, I am not a perfect person... I'll admit it.
I am just a sinner saved by the grace of God.
How I wish I could be a perfect person that walks perfectly (all the time) in the sight of God. In my heart ,I wish and long for a closer relationship with my Father. I desire to please Him. I desire his will for my life. I want to serve him and to do good things with the life He has given me. I also want to be an example to others of how God can take nothing and make it into something.

I realize that I am weak. I realize that I am NOTHING without Him.
I also know that I must decrease in order for him to increase.
No, I am not who I use to be and
 I hope that when my life comes to an end, that
I'll be where I should be and who God wants me to be.

But for now, this is who I am.
I Am A Child Of God.
I am a piece of clay in the Master's hands.
 The love He has for me can't be compared to anything this world has to offer. He knows who I am. He hasn't given up on me ,because He knows my heart ,and who I could be. He thinks I'm special and worthy. He has showered me with love and blessings that I do not deserve, but that He wanted me to have ,despite who I am.
I am his and He is mine and it's not because of who I am,
but because of who He is in my life...
He Is My Father.